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LIKE YOUR GRANDMA USED TO GIVE YOU

By The Funk on December 10, 2006.


Urbane philosopher Tasty Taste once wrote (in the epic poem Granny Said Kick Yo Ass) : “I’m gonna kick yo’ ass”

“That was just a good old-fashioned butt whuppin’,” Clippers point guard Sam Cassell said. “Like your grandma used to give you when you messed up and you knew you were going to get it.

(Coach Don Nelson of the Warriors described their 129-89 loss as “an ass-kicking,” as we reported)

WHY THE NBA IS ON NOTICE THAT FRESH, CRITICAL BEATDOWNS ARE NOW BEING SERVED:
* Tony Parker remembers that he can pass. 12 assists in the half against the Clippers. In… the… half. 15 for the game, career-best, and 8 of 9 first-half treys were assists from him. Of course, Eva Longoria is calling his love permanent and marrying him now. The man just keeps showing new levels of improving his game.
* Francisco Elson is a member of the above-mentioned prodigy’s fan club. SanFran (as I’m now calling him, mark your calendars) is breaking with Tres Bien and it’s on, fully. Their N-A-S-T-Y dunk combo on the Clips was Nash-Stoudemire worthy. Remember, Tony used to shoot first and pass questions later, and SanFran used to be on another team.
* 5 To 1, baby, 1 in 5 … 31 assists to 6 turnovers (season low)
* rare, early season .750 win record, tied for league best, and it’s not even Chanukah yet, much less Cinqo de Mayo
* 75% also represents our FT %, which makes the Spurs dangerous. Seriously.
* we’ve won the last 3 by about 90 points, averaging over 20 a game, a franchise first
* Our bench is putting up huge numbers, especially minutes. Scary. Especially since Finley and Ginobili are both benefitting greatly from their rotation. Tim and Rob are getting rest, and our reserves are getting really good.

This is what dynasties are made of. See below for erudite observations of the Wreck of the Hesperus game the Spurs just laid on the Clippers…

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